... faded memories ...

What a difference a week makes.

Self Portrait Challenge { October - Fears }

When I entered 5th grade, it was my 5th school change since kindergarten began. I was alone in a sea of kids I didn't know... again.

My teachers were kind, understanding even... I still panicked that their cursive methods didn't match what I'd learned, and I hadn't even started learning the math they were already into.

I was overwhelmed, and the tears came.

This is how I earned a new nickname for the rest of the schoolyear - Crybaby.

The kids who I had hoped to befriend turned on me in a moment... such acute pain.

I realize now that from that time on, I tried very hard to not be caught seen crying unless I was around someone safe, and even then, only when it would be considered acceptable.

Now I know, though, that being moved to tears is part of how God made me. It's alright. I'm alright. And I'm not afraid for you to see me cry anymore.







for Self Portrait Challenge's October theme - Fears

( smile )

No smile is as beautiful as the one that struggles through the tears.

thanks, I believe I will

What is a good gift?

I have recently had several conversations with women who are already stressed about Christmas. Not visiting family, or traveling, no - instead they are stressed over finances for gifts. Perhaps you are one of them.

One of these conversations involved a list of things one woman said she has to buy for her kids (for gifts). I heard the desperation over how much the list will cost, and the inevitable stress she is preparing for now, to be able to get through what it will take to buy these things. Perhaps you can relate to her.

Here's what was running through my mind while I listened to her - Have to buy? Inevitable stress? These are choices made, not facts of life.

I realize we all want to give good gifts to our children. Jesus even said this is a reflection of how God Himself wants to give us His Holy Spirit (Who brings with Him a bounty of wonderful gifts into our lives!)

But what does a "good gift" truly look like?

There are many meanings for the word good. One that I noticed while reading through these definitions is "healthy, beneficial". Are expensive gifts beneficial to our kids? I know they can be fun for a time, but does more money spent equal more fun? And at what cost? Does making our kids happy require a certain dollar figure, stress, frustration, fights with our spouses, and the long-term effects of letting our kids grow up thinking material consumerism is healthy?

A friend told me yesterday she does not want her kids to have a poverty complex - to feel like they have to pinch and scrape and do without, with the underlying basis of fear - because God is a generous God. I agree.

I also know, from experience, that "blessing" does not mean "being rich and the absence of money problems". If that were so, then God would be short-sighted, which He most certainly is not. While He wants us to have every good thing He can pour out in our laps, these things have a more eternal wrapping on them, and they come, not from a jolly old elf, but His powerful Holy Spirit. Unexplainable Joy... Peace Despite Circumstances... Wisdom...A Future and a Hope... Love... And More and More, because God is limitless!

As we've seen, God's lavish gifts are not things that can be measured or priced. God even gave His Son, whose birth we celebrate at Christmas, which was an immeasurable gift with profound possibility - life without separation from Him.

That leaves us at a disadvantage, especially since we do not have the vast universe at our disposal for creating perfect gifts for each person on our list. Perhaps that is why we are tempted to spend so much - money feels like the currency of most worth that we humans can get our hands on (what, you don't have a Tree of Faith in your yard, or a Big Box of Peace in your closet?)

Part of the meaning of gift is "something bestowed or acquired without any particular effort by the recipient or without its being earned." Do any of us deserve the gifts we receive, either from God or from others? Obviously not. So that leads me to ponder, what do our children deserve as gifts? Somehow, "more money spent = more special gifts" just doesn't quite sound right to me in this light.

Is money the only valuable currency you have? On the contrary; you, yes you, have things can be gifts to others. Another meaning for the word gift is "natural endowment, talent". Take a moment and make a mental list of the natural talents you have. Ask God to show you what they are, if you are having trouble coming up with something - He knows how He made you! With a little thought, those talents can be turned into gifts for others.

Are you crafty? The possibilities are endless! Are you craft-impaired, but willing? There are magazines and blogs and websites galore that can give you ideas and directions to make special gifts that are not complicated or costly. Can you cook? I don't know anyone who would not appreciate a home-baked treat or home-cooked meal.

What about your time? Time is a precious gift. Make up a "gift card" that offers a special "date" - a meal, or an ice cream cone, or coffee (for adult recipients, unless your kids are immune to caffeine) with time to sit and chat. Or how about for a "fun day with Mom and Dad" of games, movies, and whatever else your kids enjoy doing, all in the comfort of your home, with your undivided attention. I'm sure you can come up with more ideas besides these. Please share them, too, as I always need new ideas!

Your choices regarding gifts will impact your children in ways you may not see now. Will they remember every gift you stress yourself out to be able to afford? I doubt it. I know they will remember the peace, love, and joy that surrounds them when their home is filled with God's Spirit - the true Spirit of Christmas.

Self Portrait Challenge - { SOOC 4 }

Final week of Straight Out Of Camera (SOOC) over on Self Portrait Challenge...





I am obsessed with hanging my laundry outside. I know that may seem old-fashioned and archaic - modern technology allows us to tumble dry, right? But at what cost? In an attempt to save electricity, I bought a two-line retractable clothesline this past spring, and used it all summer to help cut the high electric costs that come with summer in Texas.

In the process, I discovered some things...

- Laundry hung outside smells amazing!

- Try washing everything on your bed, line-drying, and then remaking it right off the line... the fresh, outdoorsy scent will send you right into la-la land that night!!

- Being outside in the sunshine for a few minutes to hang and then fold really boosts my mood.

- I finish the job! I can't tell you how many times clothing sat in the dryer for days before I remembered it was there... stuff on the line gets my attention everytime I walk through the house and look out the window.

- small steps truly can make a difference...

Self Portrait Challenge - { SOOC 2 }

There are so many things in life that I cannot control, so organizing the things that I can control allows me a way to find some calm amidst the unpredictable.


More Straight Out Of Camera shots over on Self Portrait Challenge...

a rebus story

Yesterday, we took

to the





for a regular check-up.

Their office is currently





for renovations, so when we were leaving, a





construction worker said to me, "You have a





As I stood there staring at it woefully, thinking "UGH, I have to





in the hot





with two kids and a dog in the car,

the friendly worker says to me, "Don't worry, I have a





and we'll fill it up for you."

He ran back inside, brought it out, and filled up my tire right on the spot!

When he did, we found it had a





so the leak was a slow one.

I drove straight to the





and it was fixed right away.




I am blown away on how God took care of me with this situation.

If this had happened at, say, the post office or the library, I would not have had a friendly team of construction guys there to help me with a ready air compressor!

With Chad out of town right now, I couldn't have called him!

And my afternoon was free, so the trip to the tire store wasn't a huge imposition (I didn't like it, but who would?)

I am so very thankful! Very!!

don't believe them

If anyone ever tells you that you should try a beta fish because it's is a cheap and easy pet to care for, run the other way.





Why is this beta fish in a measuring bowl, you ask?

Good question.

Easy answer. Chad dropped the fishbowl while cleaning it last night.

Right after he had refilled it to the top with clean water. And yes, the fish was in the water.

So he grabbed for the fish to rescue it, sliced his knuckle on the broken bowl, and ended up with four stitches and prescription pain meds at 11pm.

That left me at home, with the mess. Do you know how hard it is to clean up a gallon of water as it pours all over the counter and onto the floor, when it's mixed with gravel and shards of glass, and the counter is still covered with dinner dishes?

So after the copays for the ER and the meds, I now have to go buy the darn thing a new bowl and gravel... this fish is no longer a cheap pet, let me tell you.

But the fish is ok. And Chad will be fine.

Thank goodness.

goodbye 2009

What a year this has been! I've been so busy trying to enjoy Christmas vacation with my girls the last week or so that I haven't been on the computer much... that's why there haven't been many blog posts lately - I hope you understand, since I'm sure most of you are busy with your families this time of year as well!

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I got around to filling in my 2010 calendar a bit early this year, sitting down with it yesterday to get it ready for hanging up on Friday. Memories of this post came flooding back as I started working on it.

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I have several designs in my etsy shop that I've marked down for an end-of-the-year sale... click here to browse them... it's time to make way for new designs in the new year! Sale prices will remain until Jan. 3rd.



Have a safe and fun New Year's Eve!

the bells

I just have a few moments to write a post, life has been crazy here! I have a pile of pictures to edit and share from New York, but haven't had the time to sit here to do it. I have new designs I want to put in my etsy shop for Christmas, hopefully soon!

One of the things keeping me busy is the rehearsals for our church's Christmas program - an adaptation of The Christmas Carol. I'm a dancing townsperson in Christmas Past. Oh, and just last week, our group of dancers was told we also get to play another part later in the production with these:




We got all excited - another part, yippee!
Playing with the music for "The Carol of the Bells" for the Christmas Future scene!

Then they told us the church rented these bells, and due to the rarity of the set, they were flown in from Pennsylvania. When they started telling us how much it would be to replace each bell... yikes! By the time we started practicing with them, we were treating them like glass!

"My" bell is huge (the bell is 7" tall without the handle), it's like the one on the right in the above picture, and it is so heavy, my arm was sore the first night. But, oh, it is so fun.

Where are all the egg rolls??

That was my question.
After stopping at THREE grocery stores in one day.

I wanted egg rolls to go with this recipe which we love... but a fresh egg roll on the side makes it complete!

So I had egg rolls on my shopping list, and was surprised to not find any at the store I usually shop. Last time I bought them there, it was in the fresh deli section (to buy & bake yourself), but there weren't any in the freezer section this time either.

I was disgruntled at needing to stop somewhere else for one thing, nevertheless I stopped at the grocery store across from our church, a trip that lasted at least 30 minutes with two girls in tow. Nada. Zip. Zilch. I went through the fresh deli section THREE times, and do you know what I did find a whole case of every time I circled the section? Sushi. All kinds and shapes and sizes. But no egg rolls. The freezer section wasn't any better after two trips around it as well, except for a box of weird-looking mini egg rolls that looked more like Totino's Pizza Rolls (not at all what I was hoping for!)

Now I was just plain frustrated. And determined.

I was about to stop in at the good ol' takeout place for the "real" thing, but dinner still wasn't for a few hours and I didn't really want to have to reheat takeout rolls (I prefer to bake them fresh).. so as I got out of the car in their parking lot, the grocery store two doors down challenged me to find just what I need...

Do you know what greeted me as I walked into the fresh deli section? Another full case of sushi.

Arg!!! The world cannot have come to this! How could anyone think sushi is the appropriate side dish for sweet and sour chicken, or broccoli beef stir fry?!? OR that we no longer are in need of an occasional egg roll now that the sushi trend has taken America by storm?!?

Aha! What is this my eyes fall upon, literally in the last case of the last aisle of the freezer section? A single egg roll selection, squeezed between stuffed jalepenos and some other fancy appetizers!

Clutching my box, I ran to the registers, where a young man asked me, "Did you find everything you needed today?"



A quick note on the recipe linked above:
I substitute a bag of pre-shredded coleslaw mix for the cabbage & carrots in the recipe, which makes it much faster to put together.

Enjoy.

And if you want to buy egg rolls to go along with it, save yourself more time by serving sliced pineapple instead.

Self Portrait Challenge - { guilty }

As I looked through the list of the Seven Deadly Sins for Self Portrait Challenge this month, it was with humility I was brought to my knees again at the reminder that I have committed them all. Not, perhaps, where it has been visible to others. But according to these verses, even when there has been just a thought in my mind in that direction, I have committed the sin in the same way as someone who has gone full-blown in pursuit of it.


"You have heard the commandment that says, ‘You must not commit adultery.’ But I say, anyone who even looks at a [someone] with lust has already committed adultery with [that person] in [their] heart.

You have heard that our ancestors were told, ‘You must not murder....'But I say, if you are even angry with someone, you are subject to judgment! If you call someone an idiot, you are in danger of being brought before the court. And if you curse someone, you are in danger of the fires of hell."

Matthew 5: 27-28, 21-22


Everything good in me is actually Jesus in me -
without Him, I'd be a messed up mess without hope.

:: pool party! ::

We had lots of fun on Sunday,
at a friend's home who just put in a new pool!


Claire had lots of fun balancing on several noodles at once...



Nicole set up shop in the pool's fountain...



and she asked me afterward why her toes were so sore!



Another couple who came brought their 9-week old Shih Tzu puppy, Howie - adorable! The girls had so much fun with him, they completely wore him out, so he took a nap in a pile of stuffed animals......

anti-antibacterial

A friend passed on this article about antibacterial soaps -
it's very informative, so I'm passing it on here:

Go here to read the article on WebMD

Antibacterial soaps are just like antibiotics -
they do not kill viruses - that means they don't prevent colds, the flu, or stomach bugs!

Did you know they are also harmful to the environment? I did not!

You can still buy soap that is not antibacterial, you just have to read the label - I've found liquid hand soap, dish soap, and cleansing hand wipes (Wet Ones) that are all not antibacterial, all at Walmart - notice in all the products below they don't say "antibacterial" on the label.



And as the article says, it's all in the way you wash your hands, not the product you use - lather up & rub for 20 seconds, paying attention to the areas between your fingers & under your nails, then rinse with hot water.

I'm not a germophobe at all, I just felt this was great information to pass, especially since we all just got over the swine flu scare...

arise my love

For me, Easter is far more significant than Christmas. I know we all love the Christmas season, but without Easter, Christmas was pointless. Without Jesus Christ's death and resurrection, and the salvation we all can have because of it, His birth would have been insignificant.

The following song represents more to me than just Jesus death and resurrection. As I listen to the words, and hear the Father say, "Arise, My Love!" I know these words were meant for me, and for you, because we are the love of God's life, the desire of His heart.



arise, my love
the grave no longer has a hold on you!
no more death's sting
no more suffering
arise,
arise, my love!

Self Portrait Challenge - { headless }

As I already mentioned yesterday, I had the flu last week & the week before, and so did my whole family. So when this month's Self Portrait Challenge theme of "Headless" began last week, I knew exactly what my first submission would be.

If I could just get up the energy to stage the shot.
And then edit it.
And then put it online & write about it.
Nothing is as easy when you're sick... so I'm very thankful to be well again.
I feel like I have my head back, actually.

Self Portrait Challenge - { introductions }

February is "Introductions" on SPC... the group changed venues a few months back to Flickr, which changed the participants a bit. Thus the theme, so we can get reacquainted with one another.

I found SPC in the summer of '07. This month seems to have flown by for me! I had lots of ideas for this challenge, but life got in the way.

I love my life, with all it's ups and downs, because it's unique and it's in the palm of God's hand. My family, my business, my friends, my talents - none of it is truly mine, I am simply a steward of the things God decided to put in me.

...ponderings...

my girls & I have been discussing these things today...

If Danny is a nickname for Daniel, what is Denny a nickname for?

How do you read the fraction 5/21 out loud? Five-twenty-firsts? Does that sound as weird to you as it does to me?

Why do jeans curl up at the hems when you wash and dry them?

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After reading this hilarious post (and this one, too), I decided to check out some of the google searches that have led people to my blog. I was met with plenty of things to consider:

free vintage farm labels to put on blogspot
Yikes, I have no clue where to find those... do you own a vintage farm? work on one? wish you did? just curious.

hoops & yoyo costume for kids
Sorry, while I can sew up a storm, I don't do costumes... have you seen the things I sew? Because I don't think I'm even in the top 10 most-likely-to-be-able-to for making something that looks like Hoops or Yoyo...

self portrait in a shoe
I haven't tried that one yet! Maybe if SPC does a Nursery Rhyme challenge, I'll give that a try...

sunnybrook farm meat animation
I cannot even begin to comprehend how you would animate meat.

women are supposed to be very calm generally
Says who???

house smells gym socks
Perhaps it's time to get those teenage sons in on helping you with the laundry?

sheep design costume
As I previously stated, I'm not a costume seamstress. But I think I can help with this one - would white shirts with glued on cotton balls work?

sunnybrook farms cottage cheese
Yes, please, I'd love some. Is that a brand name for a real dairy farm, or are you making suggestions for other career paths I ought to try out? I don't think my neighbors would appreciate cows in my yard - can you imagine the smells?

strange smell in my brand new home
I feel for you, I've been there. I suggest you take my advice to not add to the problem by opening a dairy farm in your yard, no matter how much people beg you to help meet their cottage cheese cravings.

the twelve days of birthdays

If your kids were born twelve days apart, with one of them having been born on Valentine's Day, then you know how crazy it can be with all the gifts, cake, parties (both birthday AND Valentine's varieties), cupcakes, candy, cake, cards & tissue paper, and oh, did I mention cake???

First came Nicole's birthday. This started off with a gift for each sent home with daddy from their uncle, aunt & cousin - Webkinz pink dragons! Can we say, ecstatic?!!



Ah, this was precious - the card that Claire made for Nicole...



Mmmm, every year Nicole asks for chocolate cake with chocolate frosting (a girl after my own heart), and I added a huge helping of sprinkles because I know she loves them, even at nine years old.



Four days later came the joint party - a pajama party complete with pajamas (of course), pizza, a movie & Funfetti cupcakes.

Here's all the girls in their pajamas, eager to get their sugar rush on.



The girls received a couple of joint gifts at the party... this particular one was so fun - two hands shot up from amidst the crowd for all to see and squeals of delight from all the girls arose - apparently Cooking With Mama for the Wii is quite popular among the young folks these days. Kit Kittridge, too.



Our sweet Skye had only been with us for a day when the party descended on her.



Two days later we were at Gramma & Grampa's for another little party, including one of their Auntie's famous cakes. I've mentioned before how my sister is talented in areas I am not - case in point, cake decorating. No one would ever want to eat her masterpieces, if it wasn't for the fact that it was chocolate cake under all the pretty frosting. The ladybugs and bumblebees were edible, too.



Doesn't every family turn the lights out when the candlelit cake comes to the table, to get the fullest effect?



A few more days pass, and we reach the finish line of the birthday race... Claire's and St. Valentine's Day.

Leapster headphones are more fun than the Leapster itself...



Yeah, no looking back at my sister's cake now, alright? M&M's are another art form in and of themselves, didn't you know that? Claire has asked for a rainbow cake every year for three years in a row. I got this idea from Beki. Oh, and the flavor is lemon, in case you're curious.




So if you've been wondering why I've been scarce here on my blog, now you know. I hope to now return to my LBB - Life Before Birthdays. Oh, wait - my nephew's birthday is Friday...

At least I can get one last slice of cake.